50 Shades of Black

I have to interrupt this regularly scheduled blog for an important announcement.  According to most of western culture, the most important film of our time is about to hit the movie theaters this weekend - Valentine's Day for crying out loud.

And all I have to say about it is:  literally, God damn it.

I'm not talking about the people involved in the production, although somewhere deep inside of them they probably know that neither the book nor the movie should have been written or made.  Free speech supposedly includes them, but why does free speech seem to hinder the ability to speak out against something as treacherously dark as bondage pornography?  Each and everyday it seems like I'm bombarded with news or vocalizations of students or adults that unconsciously, or consciously, allowed pornography to take hold of their lives.  And with each voice crying out in terror at the way they start objectifying the other gender, or even the same one, there is the louder voice in culture today proclaiming with a smug, self-satisfaction, "What's the harm?  It's consenting adults in a relationship - experimenting." 

I hate that word now.  It used to mean something in a science class room, checking to see which chemicals will combust or lay dormant; it meant donning safety gear in a laboratory to see how elements punch each other in the face.  But now it is almost exclusively used in the realm of sexuality.  It's just people trying out new things to see if they like them.  The problem is, instead of adults doing most of the experimentation, it's curious young people on the verge of adulthood who are having their innocence raped by pornography.

"It's just a bit of fun.  Stop being such a prude.  The world has changed; get out of the 1800's."  I hear them all, every day.  They know I'm a pastor and sometimes they say it just to get my goat, but let's lay aside my pastorhood for a little while and let me talk as a father.  Has our society been flushed into the toilet in such a way that we, as parents, would revel in the thought of seeing our children on screen portraying the degrading acts on the silver screen?  Would any parent like to see his or her daughter tied up, bound and gagged pretending that this kind of sexual activity is preferable to genuine, honest connection in a marriage?  Would you as a father or mother, after seeing your daughter whipped and beaten in a 'playroom', not stand up and make a large amount of noise to see that that person would be punished?

"It's just a movie," they say; just like they would add, "they are just video games or music videos.  They don't really change how people behave.  You just need to know how to process them."

In 1980 I saw Star Wars for the first time.  I was overwhelmed by the cinematography, the acting, the characters and the realism.  I saw the light saber and the guns and I wanted to be a Jedi.  For the next weeks, I fashioned my own light saber and my brother and I acted out the scenes of the movie that we could remember.  At seven years of age, I still remember the moment when Obi Wan Kenobi gets sliced in half.  The horror I felt still lives with me this day.  I can't erase it.  I remember when Major League came out.  It shaped the kind of athlete I wanted to be.  I remember when Silence of the Lambs came to the theater in Forest City and for weeks I was afraid to even ask for skin lotion.

Movies move us.  We can't erase what we've seen, no matter how hard we try.  According to recent statistics, ninety-nine percent of teenagers at the age of fifteen will have seen some sort of pornography.  Pornography, in my opinion, is defined as a distortion of the intended sexual relationship which is then distributed by some sort of media.  In seventy percent of pornographic films, the woman is either beaten, slapped or abused in some way.  When young men, especially, view pornography, it literally changes their brains.  According to one of the science teachers at my school, Mel Hall, viewing pornography changes the connections in the brain and creates a hardwiring for young minds to only become aroused when they see pornographic like abuse conditions.  In other words, young men are told that sex is only good when the woman suffers.

Some would say there are varying levels of pornography and some can be used for teaching.  I say that's like saying there are fifty shades of black. 

It's interesting that 50 Shades is coming out on Valentine's as an appropriate opportunity for couples to take in a movie and 'discuss' some possibilities for spicing up their relationships.  Forget about emotional and relational stimulation, let's try out bondage scenarios.  They are, of course, just a supplement to the love we have for each other.

God damn it.  Damn the devil and his ability to distract couples from experiencing sexuality in a healthy and pleasure-ful.  God damn this infatuation with projecting the next level of sexuality on screen to be ogled by young and old alike until this new form of subjugation of females becomes the ever increasing norm.

The most interesting piece of evidence is that the lead actress, Dakota Johnson playing 'Anastasia Steele', does not want her family watching it even though her mother said 'She was proud of her.'  Read this article if you would like.  
 http://www.msn.com/en-au/entertainment/movies/fifty-shades-of-grey-banned-in-malaysia/ar-AA92g0x?ocid=mailsignout

I don't know think I've even said the words 'God damn it' out loud for probably twenty years, but here is a perfect opportunity.  I'm asking for anyone who reads this, whether you agree or not, to think deeply how we are shaping the sexual identities of our younger and older generations by creating the 'norm' to be bondage.  Speak out, if you can, not as a Puritan, but as a member of society who longs to see young people re-establishing healthy relationships seeking, eventually, to always look out for the pleasure of the other and in doing so ultimately finding the truest love in marriage.

P.S.  I have read the books.  From a purely literary point, they are rubbish - badly written and little plot.  On screen, the plot doesn't have to be imagined.  There is no refuge from the crap.